Quiet Desperation

I've been thinking about the Thoreau quote, "Most men lead lives of quiet desperation." (Okay, it's technically the mass of men, but most men works for me. I'd even included women.) With it being the new year and me being unemployed, I've been all Dead Poets Society philisophical. It's the cheesy English major in me.

As a mentioned, I've been thinking about this quote, every night as I fall asleep for the last week. And I wonder why I have insomnia. I've wondered what it is that's get people about this idea. Do we feel pity for people leading such lives? Compassion? Disgust? Or do we ultimately identify ourselves as one of them? Inevitably we are called to ponder our own lives.

But as it is night and my mind wonders, the question I find myself posing is, "Which is worse, leading a life of desperation or being quiet about it? I even used Google to find the paragraph (#9 to be specific) from which the quote came to see if the context would help. Frankly, I found it depressing, and at 2 AM, I am not energized enough to read all of Walden to find something reaffirming.

What to make though of the quiet business? There is something about the idea of quiet desperation that makes it seem worse. The whole idea of suffering in silence. The loneliness and isolation of silence make quiet desperation a pretty miserable situation. Then again, we all know people who do not suffer in silence and make everyone else miserable in the process. I say this as a Grade A whiner. I tend to think that a loud desperation lacks the dignity of quiet one.

But since when has desperation been about dignity?

And that's the kicker. Desperation is a different kind of animal. So I reread the paragraph and realize that the quote should extend a little longer. "The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation. What is called resignation is confirmed desperation." Resignation. In action, thought, and word. That's a whole different kind of silence. Suddenly, quiet desperation loses all dignity and becomes the greater evil.