"The List"

I was introduced to the concept of “the list” by a former co-worker. For the uninitiated, “the list” is a person’s list of 5 people they could have a one night stand without complaint from their own significant another. It’s a safe list that has no real chance of happening, just a nice what if.

I immediately devised my list. My boyfriend started one but was far less enthusiastic about the endeavor. Having already forgotten one of my list, I decided it might be best to preserve it. I had a few guidelines to help me. No crushes or infatuations. Try a little variety. 5 tall, dark, handsome, British actors is way too easy. Of course, I didn’t want to err on the other side and add a guy just because he was a certain type. The result is the following men, in order.

**UPDATE** January 23, 2005
I've been thinking about the list lately, or rather, I have been thinking about the guys on "the list." I finally have someone for #4 (look below for the dirt.) Also, Kenneth Branagh, formerly #5, is off "the list." His charms have not held up over the years for me, and I have the sinking suspicion that he is an egotistical jerk. Sadly, I hve come to recognize that the #5 spot will see plenty of rotation.

I have noticed a general theme in my choices. I'm a sucker for guys who sing ballads. Despite my adolescent devotion to hair metal bands, I have definitely fallen for the cheese. I was listening to a song that I love recently, thinking how it would be the perfect song for a couple, and I realized. my b/f and I won't have a song. I would want something mushy. He doesn't listen to mushy. He mocks me for mushy. He likes hard rock. He likes Disturbed, Ozzy Osbourne, Korn, Eminem, etc. Don't get me wrong. I like some of their stuff too. I never would have thought I'd like Rob Zombie. But none of these groups provide my ideal song, and I suspect the b/f would ridicule any potential song on a matter of principal.

So, yeah, if I could convince one these musicians to make one of their songs a song for me, I'd be so there.

***UPDATE*** February 17, 2008

In my post-Valentine's Day, newlywed status, I need to update the list. This one has me a bit torn up.

John Mayer. For years, the thought of him has made me go, mmmmmm. As much as I miss his ballads for the ladies, I do really like that he has grown as a musician and a songwriter. But the hair. OMG, it's laughable. Then I found out that he had dated Jessica Simpson, which really makes me question his intelligence and/or taste. So John's been replaced by someone older, and British.


Colin Firth

I first saw Colin in Valmont, but it wasn’t until he took on the role of Mr. Darcy in Pride and Prejudice that I was hooked. I wasn’t the only one. I think most British and American women ages 25-35 who’ve seen this miniseries would agree. His status was solidified in one screen moment where he looks at his love interest. He looks so happy that he’s practically bursting along with a look of admiration and something a bit more smoldering. It wraps up as something entirely soulful. Tall, dark, and handsome with that great accent, he’s amazing. He’s such a force that in the Bridget Jones sequel, the author wrote of encounter between the heroine and the actual actor. He wins extra points for taking the role of Mark Darcy in the movie, making the currently filming sequel a must-see for me.

Hugh Laurie

It's speaks volumes about this actor's charm that the character of Dr. Gregory House is even remotely likable. Watch him in interviews and he's intelligent and self-mocking. Watch some of his British work, and he's hysterical. Hell, my husband loved his pre-game Super Bowl interview when Ryan Seacrest asked him who he thought would win and it was fairly obvious that he'd never been to an NFL game, knew nothing about the NFL, and could kill Ryan Seacrest for asking him anyway.

Ewan MacGregor

I was amazed with his breakthrough performance in Trainspotting. I adored him Brassed Off. I saw much more of him than I was prepared for in the arthouse film, The Pillow Book, and as a result I couldn’t see any of his films for awhile, I was so embarrassed. But my adoration returned with his amazing performance in Moulin Rouge. Much was made of Nicole Kidman’s singing in this film, but he’s the one who stood out for me. He’s got just so many wonderful vocal moments that get me every time. However, if he ever sings “Your Song” for me, I’m sunk, and I don’t even mind.

Josh Groban

Let's give a warm welcome to the newest member of the list. I must say, I never thought I'd be digging the younger men so much. Don't worry, this mid-twentysomething is legal. It's not so much the looks ( he's attractive, but his looks aren't his best feature.) His best feature is his voice. Josh has been honing that puppy for years, and it shows, errr sounds. This tenor is classically trained, and what could be more romantic than that voice in a romance language? It was his live performance on a tsunami aid fundraiser of his first hit, "To Where You Are" that sadly caused me to realize that the b/f and I will never have a song. Josh also gets bonus points for having the name Josh. For many years, I had the name Joshua picked for my future son (oddly, I got the idea from a character on a soap that I watched as a kid.) Some of the bonus points get deducted due to my view that the name Joshua should never be abridged for a nickname much in the same way as Pete is a type of moss while Peter is a strong name.

Rufus Wainwright

Rufus maintains the spot of #5 until I think of someone else because sadly (for me, most assuredly a good thing for him), Rufus is gay, making him the only true impossible on the list. No one likes to imagine what if when all one can imagine is an awkward moment in which Rufus says, "Thanks, but no thanks." Nonetheless, he is still a very dapper, very, very, very talented Canadian. No, not a Canadian comedian or actor, but a singer/songwriter/musician. Blessed with such amazing songwriting abilities that he proves that God does in fact bless homosexuals contrary to whatever Jerry Falwell might say.