Sloop John B Day

Here's a sampling of my day to give you an idea of how it went.

Left alone to man the office, I have a guy come in pretty upset. He wants to speak to Employee #1 or #2. I explain that neither of them are in the office and offer to take a message. This would not do.

"What's #1's cell phone number?"

"I'm sorry. I can't give out that number."

"What?!?!?!?!" That can't be. Who do I call to get it?"

"I'm sorry. #1's the only one I can get permission from."

Angry mumbling. So being polite and trying to help, I offer...

"Let me try to catch #1 on #1's cell."

This was well received. So I call #1 who tells me,

"I don't deal with that. Talk to #3."

I should add that #1 was cranky that I called. So I tell the visitor this, informing him that I am allowed to give him #3's number. He's irate. He doesn't want to talk to #3. He's talked to #3. #3's no help. #3's useless. Blah, blah, blah. Whine, whine, whine.

"I'm sorry. #1 said #3 is the one you need to talk to."

So being the helpful person that I am, I take the initiative, calling #3, who doesn't answer, and leave a message.

"Well can't you call #2?"

Well with honeyed tones like that, how could I resist?

"Sure."

I pick up the phone, only to have 2 other lines flash with incoming calls. So I work my receptionist magic, and on busy days, it is magic. All the while directing the delivery guy who has now walked in.

When the phones and deliveries are taken care of, I return the task of calling #2 at which Mr. Attitude, in a tone more befitting a friend, says,

"Oh, I don't envy you. It's gotta be insane (as in busy) around here. Having to deal with all the people coming in. I don't know how you do it."

Imagine if you will, me sitting at my receptionist's desk, with a stunned, mental, "Oh my God." Followed immediately with a mental, "It'd be great if I didn't have to deal with jacka$$e$ like you."

I smile politely and start dialing. #2, much to my delight, doesn't answer so I leave a message.

Confident that I have done everything I can and more than this guy deserves, I offer to pass along his business card to #3 and to have #3 contact him. Handing me his card, he includes two coupons for business. Apparently he has recognized his a$$like behavior and is trying to make nice.

"Oh, thanks, but I don't need these. I'm moving out of the area shortly."

You are not my friend. You act like jerk and no amount of kindness is going to change the fact that you thought you were justified in trying to bully me. You failed now get out of my office. Go wait for your phone call and try to act more professional in the future.

Thank God my mouth filter was in full working order and the only things that got out of my mouth were the things in quotation marks. At least some of us know how to behave professionally.